Sunday, December 26, 2010

P3P0)3P = decoded

Below are four images of our most wanted and one image of their last get-together. Study them well. This assignment is above the above-top-level level. We only have X amount of agents trained for this and you're one of them. Steel your resolve. If you have none, then consider your mission a failure before starting it. If you believe your resolve true, then reaffirm your confidence before taking this one on. The job won't be easy. Rate of survival is 0.00008%. Good luck and goodnight.

Mister Skin: The ringleader of the Compass Rose. He represents the West. Agent Gold underestimated him and, as you can see here, Skin is wearing Gold's dermis like a track suit. A sociopathic freak, Skin is a ghost to us. There's no photographic record or first hand account of what he looks like underneath his new faces. His history is a complete blank. We imagine he found solace in murdering people and wearing their skin. Our researchers believe Skin has mastered an alchemic art that allows him to utilize the skin's special abilities. Proceed to hunt him with extreme caution or prepare to lose your skin. [photo by Bill Otomo]

Selene: she was previously under our employ. One of our top twenty-five. After the fiasco in Martinique, she made her true alliance known. Selene represents the South for Compass Rose. Being an Atlantean sorceress, she was of great use in any tactical situation. But facing her, we are in for an uphill battle. Selene had access to all our databanks, manuals, profiles, technology-- all of it. Matahari has nothing on this modern marvel. Her only weakness: sex. Selene made her way through our organization with her Atlantean seduction magic, but her hunger for bodily lust will be her downfall. Make it so and stay protected.

Do Svidaniya: the Compass Rose powerhouse. Representing the North, this agent was singlehandedly responsible for the incident in Elista last Christmas. Seen here is her Korean trained ultrapolar bear, the White Russian. The White Russian is strong and bulletproof. This woman is an unstoppable force. The upper limits of her strength are unknown, but just because she's all power doesn't mean she isn't crafty. Once in Lyon, we tracked her down with a team of twelve. She baited them out of hiding, tore them to pieces, and left their entrails hang where they rested. Her one true weakness isn't a weakness at all. She's stronger without the White Russian by her side. Her weakest is when she's with her bear. Fighting both is the only logical strategy. [Image by Chamonkee]

The Crayon Eater: representing the East, this is the Compass Rose's secret ultimate weapon. This is a god in human form. When this kid eats crayons, he warps reality into his particular mold. He doesn't even need to eat a crayon to activate his power. Our field agents say he only ate one crayon during his 37-hour megadeath spree in Mozambique, so our guess is all he needs is the taste or a memory of crayon taste. Our only hope lies in the fact that he is still a kid. His imagination is innocent, pure, raw, unadulterated creativity of which he can pour into our reality's fabric. All X of you agents will have to find a way to constrain the Crayon Eater yourselves. [By James Jean]

The Compass Rose Coronation: a ceremony held by a fifth party in celebration of the new Cardinal Directions. The first and last coronation we saw was the inauguration of the latest Compass Rose. We don't know how far their power reaches, how deep their roots have grown, or who the fifth party hosting the coronations is. All we know is they know everything, could possibly have the power of the world, and are looking out for their best interests no matter the consequences humanity must suffer as effect. [news clipping from TORIKO]

Take time to fully comprehend this mission. If you choose not to accept it, then we are doomed. If you do choose, then fill out a last will and testament before being briefed on the particulars.

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