Encryptions Decrypted VI

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and so he says to the guy, "Pokemon isn't like real life, real life is like Pokemon!"

bzzzzzt

Sorry about that. The transmission was interrupted by the tail end of a joke. Again, dearest apologies for the inconvenience. Commit information to mind and then delete from all hardware memory banks. Press start to begin.

Pictured here is infamous luchador/lothario, Muerto Gigante. He's a trained cat master. His feline sidekick, Monsieur Moustache is pictured beside him. The cat can elongate his body, disguise himself as other feline species, and levitate. Be warned! His claws are deathly poisonous. A single prick would cause paralysis in 10 and death in 45...seconds. Gigante himself is 777-time Rose Eye championship winner and prides himself for it. He and the cat are completely white in color. It may look like an uncolored copy but it isn't. He just dresses like that. All. The. Time.

Here's what seems to be photographic proof of Ryan Reynolds portraying Han Solo in a Star Wars remake. What it really is is a wanted poster for the real Han Solo who just happens to look like Ryan Reynolds. IF YOU SEE HIM OR THINK YOU SEE HIM OR FEEL LIKE YOU MIGHT SEE HIM, LET US KNOW. HE IS TO BE CAUGHT ALIVE ONLY. And if by chance you catch the real Ryan Reynolds, tell him you're sorry, and you loved him in Waiting.

Japanese pop sensation Bobobo-bo Bo-bobo with backup artists Don Patch and the Jelly Jiggler are racing up the charts. How is this teen to mature heartthrob stealing the hearts of the Japanese people? You're mission is to find out. It may have to deal with his golden afro. Inspect carefully. We have reason to believe there may be weapons of marimo destruction within.

This is the Straw Hat crew. They're a notorious pirate gang currently searching for something called One Piece. HQ doesn't know what One Piece is. You don't know what One Piece is. They don't know what One Piece is. So, basically, your mission is to know before they know so that we know what One Piece is. From left to right, top of bottom: Tony Tony Chopper, MD. Talking midget reindeer doctor with a penchant for malpractice. Nami. Hottie McHotpants Hothot/navigator. Dead Bones Brooke. Rockstar, pile of bones, afro enthusiast. Roronoa Zoro. Samurai death. Monkey D. Luffy. Captain, fatass, human disposal. Sanji. The cook. Franky. Automated mechanic toy gone sentient with one goal...to kill. Nico Robin. The only Swiss Army knife to be manufactured by Victoria's Secret. Not pictured: Usopp. Looks like Pinocchio, acts like Pinocchio, might be Pinocchio.

Your final assignment: THE LOVERS. The world's two greatest thieves are working hand in hand. We know they're names, know what they look like, but that's it. No database in the world has information on them besides what's detailed here. Considered THE MOST DANGEROUS DANGER COULD EVER GET. So unless you're ready to bend over, rub some lube in there, and get ready for the burn, you might want to skip this one. For top agents only with clearance from all seven supreme commanders.

End.