TOP SECRET TIPS IX

This is it. The end of the line. The end of TIPS. TIPS was a great premise, a wonderful challenge, and a financially rewarding project. In my time with TIPS I learned the dos and don'ts of selling a tip jar. Not hard. Not easy. If there's a final tip out there I could tell you at home reading this, then it's this: love with an open heart, laugh with a genuine smile, and live with an happy mind. This is the final episode of TIPS. Number nine.

Dr. Vincente is here with the diagnosis of diagnoses. Examine the three panels here. Answer the question carefully. There is a 99 in 99 percent chance that what you see is TIPS. See, tipmania affects the entire world population. There is no cure. The only known treatment of tipmania is tipping someone nearest you with a sentiment or preferably money.

This message approved by THE World Doctors Association. 

"We're doctors and shit. We know what's good for you."

I was in the game mode doing this. I wanted to combine my love of Seaport Village and my love for pirate treasure maps and this came of it. Enjoy the journey. It's pretty straightforward through the Big Wave, the Seaport Monster, near the Pearl of Dreams, past the Devil Ray Giant, and finally reaching the end, Isla de Dinero.

[here's a secret tip: the treasure to be found is adventure]

These last three TIPS hold a dear spot in my heart and hopefully in yours. They form the most epic movie of all time: TIPS. This being movie poster number one where it teases action, suspense, thrills, and chills. I love that coin flipping into the tip jar. You want to know how many people asked me what the plot was for TIPS? About the same amount of people that tipped me for creating such a ridiculous idea. A LOT.

Soon as I wrote the tagline for this second TIPS movie poster, a huge hotel in downtown San Diego put up a HUGE sticker over their building for the Scott Pilgrim movie. The tagline for that movie was almost identical. Damn, great minds think alike. TIPS however is a movie starring Barnaby Jones and Sarah Star, only the greatest actor and actress duo of our time. Both carry guns and vendettas for an unknown cause. This being the second movie poster, I stopped teasing so I could show you who's in it.

The final TIPS. The third and last movie poster for the movie, TIPS. This is where we get a taste of the plot and a new tagline. I had so much fun doing this card, it being the last and all. I made a lot of money while these TIPS sat in my world window. The plot of the movie? Here's a contrived vague answer to this question I'd like to never answer:

TIPS is about something.

TOP SECRET TIPS VIII

TIPS is going into the crazy eighth season here at Secrets are for Spies. TIPS is a federally funded profit organization whose sole existence is to provide me with more money on top of the money I make for working. Join me, why don't you, for a trip down memory lane in the land of TIPS.

Can I say something? I love female genies. Girl-genies are the mermaids to my pirate life. If only I could find some dusty oil lamp, rub it, and a beautiful woman would come out and grant me three wishes. My three wishes? Haha, now that's the secret.

We see what the girl-genie wished with her guy-genie. She used all three wishes for TIPS and maybe a smile. That's what I call dedication to her job as my fictional plaything. Now, why a genie lady would have a genie gent is beyond me. Maybe dating for genies works the same as indentured servitude-- with someone the master and someone the servant.

Ninja girls however have a rather unusual relationship with me. I draw them having fun, they have fun, but they disappear as soon as possible. This sign was originally supposed to be an Eschereque staircase type thing, but I wanted to incorporate ninjas into it, so...yeah. Came out so much better than I would've hoped.

One of the best times I had drawing TIPS was drawing this. I was sitting in my friend's car, I opened her car door, and used one of her old water bottles to figure out how water splashes. Then I drew the whole thing in the passenger seat on a tiny notebook. This is by far a better take on the whole "tip me over thing" and was one of the only times late in the TIPS season to not have the word TIPS in complete four letters on it. Made me lots of TIPS, this one did.

I don't even know. I...I just don't. I think I wanted to increase customer interactivity with my TIPS so I made a game where they helped the money find a way to the cup. People kept asking me, "hey, young sexy man can you please spank me harde--" err, I mean, they kept asking me, "hey, Mr. Sexy, how much is it to play your TIPS game here?" Really? REALLY? I thought it was a joke, but people kept asking me! I joked back that it was $0.50 to play and it WORKED. The kiddies had fun playing it especially when I was making car noises while they maze-trekked.

TOP SECRET TIPS VII

By this moment in time, you've received six sets of TIPS. This is the seventh, the magical lucky number set of TIPS. Are they lucky TIPS? Hell, someone dipped these TIPS in Felix Felicis and made me bank level side-cash. I was happy then. I'm happy now.

TIPS start with Tea. I couldn't have said it better myself. If I ever have a tea ceremony/party, then I want this tea pot. It's like painting a shark face on your WWII fighter jet to scare air-Germans, but this is meant to badassify quiet sweet quaint tea get-togethers. I made sooooooooooo much money off of this simple word pun. Call me playful, call me full of play, but don't ever call me-- I have no idea where I was going with this -__-

DUDE. TIPS of Terror would make a great movie. It'd star a harlot, a vamp, and Vincent Price. Maybe Van Helsing. The bats were fun to draw, same as the castle, and the title. The vampire's line wasn't actually me. Someone fun told me to do it and I did. Guess what happened? Almost anyone who saw this and wasn't having a crap day would repeat that line to me for NO REASON. Serious. How much did I make with this card? Enough to jack up my tip collection into triple digits. This was early on too. 

I was in such an inquisitive mood when I made this. No one got it. The night before I watched The Prestige. If you've not seen it, then go watch it. If you have seen it, then watch it again and be on the look out for which Christian Bale is which at which point. If you have seen it, then you'll know what I'm talking about. So, the day of making this card, I was reading The Five Fists of Science by Matt Fraction. HUGE Tesla nerd moment so I had an epiphany. During all his demonstrations for the coil, did Tesla ever ask for tips like a beggar? Here's my depiction of him in panning action. Made a surprising amount with this card based on the design and the easy to read TIPS title.

It was certainly time for TIPS. This was right after my friend's birthday and I was hitting my strides in life, in work, and in TIPS. People paid out the ass to fill my tip jar that day. No idea why. Coworkers would ask what time it was [well, the ones who wanted to leave ASAP] and I would just show them the card. It became a thing at my old job. Fun times. Good times. Sweet times. Times for TIPS. 

Ok. That brown smudge on the lower left corner? Chocolate. Some little girl picked it up and got chocolate on it because she thought it was something to play with. Very flattering but a total mess was made. Sign salvaged, I made less money post-chocolate massacre than pre-chocolate massacre. But. BUT. On my break I found something floating down the cobblestone streets where I worked-- $50. Ulysses S. Grant never looked so good.

TOP SECRET TIPS VI

There comes a time when the fun ends. This is not that time. The next time won't be that time either. This TIPS-train will never end. And then it will. Choo Choo.

Absurdly, I got this idea from a second-hand tale a coworker was telling me. He started off with, "what had happened was..." and when you here those four words start off a story you KNOW it's a great story. Apparently, a friend of his worked for tips in Arizona. One day he dropped his tips [assorted coins] in the sand near his car while fumbling with his car keys. Hands still near the ground after picking up the largest coin first, a snake leapt out and tried to bite his fingers. His fingers went unscathed but his quarter did not. He couldn't find it because the snake ATE it. I still think he flung his quarter away when the snake lunged, but that doesn't make for an exciting story, does it?

 Another one of my first one TIPS cards before I decided on TIPS as the franchise name. Sometimes I wish the world never left the sensibilities and fashion sense of the 1940s behind but then again we'd never have created lowriders and booty shorts. Thank Zeus for booty shorts. The man-spy is telling the woman-spy something in morse code.

I love giving spy tips to the unwashed unlearned non-spy populace. Remember your secret packages come in every form: words, hard copy notes, trick objects, and even back-alley meetings. If there's one thing you should learn from my spy teachings it's this: >>> ___ <<< Don't blink.

A second lesson in TIPS, this time for the heavy hot summer sun fun we had. I've followed every rule listed while living in Florida. The accompanying pictures were meant to look like mirages in the sun, same goes for the title. Had a lot of fun making this one. Lots of customers asked for water after reading this, instead of let's say some soda that has salt in its secret formula which therefore doesn't quench your thirst.

There must've been some sort of tattoo convention in town the time I made this because that was my reasoning; tattoo artists and enthusiasts would love to tip a cup with a sign with a tattooed woman on it. Tips for tats, I say. Wink, don't forget the wink. I called dibs on every tattooed he and she all day and guess what? I MADE BANK.

TOP SECRET TIPS V

What time is it? TIPS time, maybe? Since you asked, I've delivered. Oh, there's more where these came from. Trust me.

I was a little bored with TIPS concepts at this point so I looked around in the bookstore near where I worked for some cool graphic design I could glean inspiration off of. I found a book on tiki culture and saw this postcard like text. This is a postcard from TIPS which is apparently an island paradise. I actually took a picture of this with my phone at the same time I customer was standing there. She thought I was taking a picture of her butt until she noticed my tip jar sign, haha.

I tried so hard on this one. I wanted color. I wanted symmetry. I almost achieved it freehand but little things are off. Still, the Queen of Hearts TIPS was fun to draw. Didn't make too much money though. Didn't expect it to either.

Tip Me Over is the VERY first TIPS card I ever did, hence the lack of the word, TIPS. I went for ultra-cute instead of anything really artistic. Not only did this card increase my tip flow, but it also invigorated me with a creative mission to do a different card every time I worked.

My. All-time. Favorite. TIPS. I made so much money off this single premise that the only thing this man needs to save his life is more tips in my tip cup. I love the random nurse/doctor. I love the angry driver that hits the dude. I love everything about this one. Hands down my favorite. What's yours so far? 

Ahh, the scrabble TIPS. I really wanted to put pimp on something so I started there and connected the dots accordingly. I wish I could play with these scrabblers. A cat, an angler fish, and an owl scholar--- hells yeah.

TOP SECRET TIPS IV

This is a lesson in spying, my friends. A lesson in conceit. A lesson in lessons. Sit down. Kick back. Get entertained.

We've seen this character before, ladies and gentlemen. Remember her name? No? Yes? I'm getting mixed answers here. Anyways, that's Niki Fury, sexy spy supreme. What's she doing on my TIPS card? Doing something really fucking cool. I originally drew this as a girl without an eye patch doing the cover-your-eye-thing but it came out looking a lot like Niki Fury so I drew the eye patch on. An hour later I realized if Niki were to cover her left eye, she'd be blind. That's when I added "see without sight," kind of a play on the Thundercats mantra "sight beyond sight." I made a LOT of money with this much to my surprise.

 Oh man, this one. I really wanted to make a comic that had to have a tip at the end. This is that idea. An idea of a ninja vs a samurai. Absolutely love the ending. I wish the S in TIPS was sharper, but letters drawn on a slant, freehand, are difficult as fuck.

 People didn't know what the hell I was talking about here. I misspelled TIPS one time as TOPS and came up with this. It could be a fancy jingle for a commercial or a morality lesson at the end of Magic School Bus. Who knows? All I know is getting tips means winning.

San Diegans love pandas. Asians love pandas. Girls love pandas. Customers LOVE pandas. Make sure to read the disclaimer. I doubt any customers read it. Also, love my taunt where I out myself as a bamboozler. HAH! Such a knee slapper. 

Here's where the magic happens. Two pen-is jokes on one card. A high concept dealing with creative familiars Pen-guin and Eraser-at. Had soooooo much fun drawing this I got carried away with the familiars.

TOP SECRET TIPS III

You didn't ask for more tips but I know you wanted more. Here's a couple during my "theme" period. Guess which witch is which.

I rushed this one. I didn't have markers for any color so that negated the need to color even one letter. I really  wanted to draw this concept though, but had time constraints, so it came out like poop post-Mexican hot chocolate: fast and a little sloppy. Don't visualize that. Please, for your own good.

I LOVE THIS ONE. My line work was on point. I was hitting strides with my magic theme but there was one big problem: the letter I. I tilted it because it would be easier for the bunny to make it to the top with the I like that. The real problem about it is that it made the tip card a little hard to access. It looked at first glance like THPS, but once you look at it you can see it's TIPS. But you can't unsee what you've seen, ya know, one of those things.

High concept. Totally clutch. I dreamt this up. Literally. Spent...maybe 25 minutes on this? One of my favorites for certain. Worked real well with the customers.

Damn, this one is great. I worked at a place in a tourist trap near the port. All prime placement for overly priced shit but a great "quaint" place to hang [I guess]. I thought about mermaids during work sometimes so I decided to create the mermaid mascot for Seaport Village [the tourist trap]. Ran with this and loved every second of it.

Here again we see a comic using my mermaid mascot. I had this convoluted bad rhyme poem like song made for this because I felt it needed a sing-song quality to it. It feels so contrived to me, but hell if it didn't make me money. One of my coworkers asked me to sing the song, so I poured a glass of water and gargled out the words because realistically that's what singing underwater would fucking sound like to us.